My "Vacation" pics in Amsterdam

As the on line experience becomes more and more expanded, I have discovered that traveling might be over rated. What with all the angry anti muslim and anti american and anti war and anti- anti war people out there, why spend money running into these nut bags? Especially when I can just take a vacation here on the couch, with the smell of fresh cooked pizza in the air. For free. I know it might not seem like a real vacation. Not until I post it on line and share pics with my envious friends! Then all those memories rush in as I tell the stories. Even if they aren't my memories. Who cares, it was a free trip. Both ways. So if you have the time like I do, I highly suggest trying it. I know that when I "get back" and read the comments my jealous friends have shared, it will feel exactly like a real genuine vacation. Minus the real genuine expenses! Who ever reads the blog part anyway. Most people just scroll down, look at the pics, add a stupid comment and then get back to work before their angry hateful boss catches them.

Anyway, here are some pics from my "vacation" in Amsterdam:

Here is a real prostitute in the famous red light district.

I took the photo while high on weed

Here I am again still taking photos in the red light district.

STILL high on weed (that guy there is also high on weed. he didn't even know I was taking the picture, he was so high)

I ended up buying all these clogs because I was frikken zonked on some

Canal #7 (that's code for weed)

And here's the bike I rented but never rode. I lost the key to the lock

cuz I had just smoked a brickload of some Blonde Affy (which is aka hashish)

it's the same feeling as being high on weed

So I ended up taking the bus a lot. I asked this lady at the bus stop if she would take a picture of me next to a real prostitute. The lady said no. And the other lady, turns out, wasn't even a prostitute and walked away. Here is a pic of the lady that wouldn't take a picture of me and that other lady (who I swore looked exactly like a real prostitute and walked away).

Then I thought, HEY! I could rent a car while I'm here...

Want some advice? Never rent a car in Amsterdam

while you are high on weed

So, after wrecking that car, I went back to the coffee shop.

I totally forgot they even sold coffee there. Then I forgot I had

wrecked that smart car. But I remembered how friendly the

natives are in good old Amsterdam.

Well, I hope you enjoyed my vacation pics.

I'm pretty sure every vacation I take will be in Amsterdam from now on.

Your friendly cyberhood

uncle Samurai

On My Way

From my secret hideout cabin in the sky of Rockridge, I have composed a song about the legalization of WEED. Yes, WEED. Marijuana. Pot. Hippy Hay. Herb. Grass. The natural ememy of Dupont Chemicals.

It wasn't my idea to legalize it. I just wrote a song about it.

Imagine, if you will, a person behind bars for selling weed. Then one day the warden appears in front of the cell and says," You are free..."

I just sat with a pen one day and imagined what that person would say...this is what I came up with.

You mean to tell me, kind sir

I don't belong here no more...

well if you please...open up the door, I'll be on my way

I 've been inside here so long

only to find out you're wrong

well if you please...hand me my phone and I'll be on my way

They legalized it, yeah. There aint much more to say

So if you don't mind, sir, opening the door...I'll be on my way

No one to blame here this time

My crime has been redefined

So please...if you wouldn't mind...I'll be on my way

I got a new chance somehow

and my jobs not illegal now

so please...unless you need a pound...I'll be on my way

They legalized it, yeah. There aint much more to say

So if you don't mind, sir, opening the door...I'll be on my way

There is one rule before we are done

Can't smoke under 21

That don't apply to everyone...so I'll be on my way

They legalized it, yeah. There aint much more to say

So if you don't mind, sir, opening the door...I'll be on my way

words and music by Musashi Lethridge

aka

your friendly cyberhood

Uncle Samurai

Po'tree: Remember, Remember To Vote In November...(the WEED Man, the WEED!

Remember, remember this coming September

to vote on the weed...Oh I mean in November!

Which means xmas shopping this coming December

will be twice as fun for you costco club members

Zig zags will come in construction sheet rolls

dispensers will drop like those olde english scrolls

as we drive home like robin hood smiling with ease

with pounds of Old Sherwood in our SUV's

Prisons will empty like import car barges

can't hold a dealer if we drop the charges

Macy's will hire these folks without fail

to market their upcoming Green Flower Sale

Remember that old alcohol prohibition

revoked by the people that owned ammunition

we pot smokers waited with patience and pride

we would never use guns or the voice that's inside

Trips to the store will be more fun than ever

I'm not being sarcastic witty or clever

shopping is great when you get what you need

but have you tried your sunday shopping on weed?

I'm shocked that department stores aren't chiming in

consumers with credit cards shop with a grin

and if your store aint selling chronic my friend

the chances are slim... that I'm coming in

Smoke it for peace, smoke it for war

and if you forget what you're smokin it for

Think about bees and how they make honey

votin for weed is like votin for money

Who put the cookie in the cookie club

the same genius who was rollin a bud

back in the 80's when you said it's crazy

to waste your time smokin so you could be lazy

They gave a cookie to some ADD kids

and oh my gawd... do you know what they did?

with out that pharmaceutical hocus pocus

weed gave them 8 hours of Jedi focus

So remember remember this coming September

add a reminder to vote this November

I won't need to kill a pine tree this December

that green and red plant will keep growing forever...

your friendly cyberhood

unclesamurai

Oakland Police Theory...just sayin'...

~we have a 211 in progress...can I get an officer down there pronto?!

Officer - "On my way...

(20 minutes later)

Officer- "SIR! Please put the gun down and step away from the counter!"

Perp- " No way man! YOU back off man...I gotta pay my damn mortgage...my wife is leavin' and both my kids are goin with her...I just got fired...I NEED the money!"

O- " You're makin' a huge mistake...think about the consequences sir...drop your weapon, put the money on the counter and put one hand on the counter..."

P- "...why one hand?"

O- (spark) puff puff...(cough) "...oooh wee...god damn...'ere..."

P- " what the...? What IS that? Is...is that weed?"

O- " This aint just weed, son...it's (cough) The Chronic. It's called Purple Brainfart or somethin'...'ERE man...take it! That's an order! TAKE IT!!"

P- "OK! ALright already, Jesus..." puff puff...(COUGH)...Jesus Chricst! (cough) This (puff) is some killer hay brah...(puff)...(cough)

O- "puff puff GIVE! That's another order... fer Christ's sake, GIVE me that gun...AND the money...THANK you...now...would you mind tellin' me what in the heck you think you were just DOIN' there, mister ? (puff puff) ...'ere... "

P- (puff puff cough) ( smile) "uh..... oh...I dunno man...you know...stress...child support...whaddya call this again?

'ere... "

O- "...Purple Brainfart...hold on...Hey...IS EVERYONE ok in here? No one hurt? All that money there? Good...now, this young man is going to apologize and then he is going to walk out of here with me...RIGHT?"

P- " uh...aww dude...I'm sorry man. I think NEXT time I'm just gonna... sell some weed, or something'. I forgot...it's legal now...my bad. I could've just sold that GUN... bought some herb...and then twi.."

O- " Alright, alright...you DO have to come with me now. These folks seem pretty upset in here, what with you wavin' that stupid gun around and all. WE need to finish this conversation downtown... But uh....... you should see some of the NEW stuff we got down at the station... came in yesterday...Bubbleberry 2.5 Update...that Bill Gates fund is on hit...knock yer frikken teeth back! "

P- " Really? ok..."

O- " what are you doin?"

P- " Aren't you gonna hand cuff me? "

O- " Hahahaha...as high as YOU are right now? You look like you need both arms... now, come on...

you gotta lighter? "

P - " uh...yeah. "

O- "... you can ride in the front seat..."

Don't forget to vote this November