Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The Legend Of The Tea Party Stalker

There once was a woman who lived in the minds

and the hearts of the people so brave and so kind

she would lurk in the shadows of political rants

and plot her revenge on these new miscreants


In a world of true sin and a world still at war

she knows all the reasons she's fighting for

so she made up her mind and she sold her old home

and spends time with her laptop on the road alone


Her first real victim was a tea party gal

she sent a request to be her facebook pal

the next thing you know there was drama on line

now the tea party gal is doing hard time


Confused and dazed she sits behind bars

and wonders how things could have gotten this far

why would my husband "go behind my back"

and " use the kids toys to smoke his crack"


Or "have 3 affairs with two young men

in the back of a Dennys bathroom AGAIN?"

and how could he ever think to be so rotten

and "sell ALL my jewelry for Oxycotin"


Then "drive out of state to a private tea party"

in an" eighteen year old girls Mazarati"

snorting" blow from her hand while drunk on Bacardi"

while I sit in jail as LaTeesha's new hottie


My children are gone and my husband has fled

And the note that he found are not words I have said

I would never" pay money to see him tied down"

and " beaten by gangsters from the West side of town"


And who told my husband that I was a liar?

And claimed " I had set that young stripper on fire"

Or slandered my name on that tea party list

" Girls Scout cookies that were soaked in my piss?"


Who hacked my e mail and credit card info

And spent all that money at Housewives And Nymphos

And posted receipts on a that junior high blog

Saying " This woman cries and she squeals like a hog"


A story of fiction? A story made up

from the recent libation that sits in my cup?

A lady who's nameless for on line conditions?

A legend of hope that may raise up suspicion?


(Dramatic Pause)

but if she is real...


She's dressed in all black and not much of a talker

Known to us all as the Tea Party Stalker

Maybe you'll met her and maybe you won't

If you are a Tea bagger... pray that you don't

To be continued...













your friendly cyberhood
Uncle samurai

1 comment:

Love Finds You said...

Almost too awesome for words, but I give kudos!!